Many people have heard this quote – and some may debate that it’s not really true. Do the people you surround yourself with really have a substantial impact on your future?
The truth is, most of us like to believe we’re not easily influenced. Some people may describe themselves as mindful or not susceptible to peer pressure – but the people you choose to spend your time with may leave a bigger impression than you realize.
Whether it’s friends, family, coworkers, or romantic partners, you should only accept quality individuals in your circle; as if your life depends on it.
How Do You Know When Someone Is A Quality Human? (Green Flags)
They Add Happiness To Your Life.
This one should be an obvious one, but find people who make you laugh. A lot.
Find people who invite you in wholeheartedly, never making you question if you’re appreciated or loved.
Choose individuals who celebrate your successes and take interest in the journey it took for you to get there.
Choose those who like to talk about self-growth and goals, rather than gossip about other people.
You Can Learn From Them.
A favorite quote of mine is, “you should never be the smartest person in the room”.
If you can’t learn life lessons, valuable insight, or further your knowledge in your career from the people you’re around daily, you’re not really growing.
They Take Accountability For Their Actions.
All relationships and friendships have speed bumps – but sometimes these speed bumps can turn into hills or mountains if not treated properly.
If you express that something upset you – a quality person will acknowledge your feelings and will choose to do better.
This applies to workplaces, group projects, and family members as well; communication shouldn’t be seen as confrontation.
They Help You Problem Solve – Even If It’s Not What You Want To Hear.
No matter how independent one may be, humans need other humans. No one can do life completely alone.
It’s important to seek guidance from people who help you solve life’s problems by helping you see things you may not have considered. They should tell you where you’re lacking and how you can improve.
These people should be rooting for you, not pushing you in the wrong direction because it’s easier.
When Should You Question The Value Of A Relationship? (Red Flags)
Boundaries Are Not Respected.
Everybody makes mistakes. Unfortunately, sometimes someone has to upset you before learning you even had a boundary in the first place.
However, if you clearly express discomfort in situations and they choose to dismiss it, you may want to reevaluate your relationship with them; people who push boundaries and ignore these feelings may not respect you as much as you hoped.
They Drain You Mentally/Emotionally.
Have you ever left a get-together with someone or a group feeling – confused? Not happy, nor comfortable – but more so exhausted or “icky”. Chances are, they’re draining you of your good energy.
This can come from a multitude of things; slandering others in conversation, complaining about things not worth complaining about, making you feel left out of the group, talking more than they listen, the list goes on and on.
They Resist Change.
Life has a funny way of knowing when you’re too comfortable and ripping the rug out from underneath you.
One of my biggest inspirations in life for these situations is my dad.
When life kicks him down, he charges forward to deal with the issue head-on. He never wallows in unfortunate circumstances; in fact, most of the time he makes jokes about them.
Those who resist change or choose to flounder in the pitfalls of life aren’t going to inspire you to deal with them any better. Choose people who have seen life’s hardships as opportunities for lessons, growth, and inspiration.
They Are Always The Victim.
Sometimes, you find yourself around people who feel like the world is out to get them.
They might complain about their boss, their coworkers, their roommates, etc. without ever asking themselves, “What can I do to better these relationships on MY end?”
People like this don’t get very far because they don’t see from others’ perspectives. It’s difficult for them to take accountability and you’d be better off not associating yourself with them if possible.
What Do You Do If You Can't Change The People In Your Circle?
Unfortunately, sometimes the people you’re around daily include coworkers or family members.
A few unpleasant colleagues here and there are normal; but if you truly believe your workplace is toxic, you need to explore other options. A nice paycheck can’t pay for your mental well-being. (unless it’s therapy, of course)
Setting new boundaries or “cutting off” family members usually isn’t feasible – but it is important to address things that upset you when they come up. If boundaries and feelings are still being violated, it’s best to take some space and stop looking to these people for support in any aspect; keep your life more private if you have to.
To conclude, being friends with people who like to party on the weekends while you like to stay home won’t stop you from getting the career you want.
but surrounding yourself with people who are supportive and motivating can help get you there faster, and they may even push you further.
When your crew is full of people who love you, listen to you, and invest in you, nothing in this world can stop you.
Feeling fulfilled in this lifetime truly stems from choosing quality people – and we sincerely believe that.